Emily's Poem

Emily Claire Hebert

October 1974

An extra X chromosome was what the amnio would show

as they tried to explain it, but they really didn’t know,

whether mild or profound your disability would be,

So it was suggested an abortion, for you and for me.

The Dr. would do a hysterectomy, along with taking you,

no more babies in the future as we struggled with what to do.

Your sister was two, had Down Syndrome with special needs,

you had two older siblings, so we consented to this cruel deed.

If someone could have counseled, stressed the heartache to come

from taking our baby’s life, this act would not have been done.

Immediately, I regretted the grievous choice we made,

but, there was no changing what happened that fatal day.

For 35 years now back in some dusty corner of my mind,

This haunting fact resurfaced once again from time to time.

It was painful to dwell upon it, so I’d quickly shut it out.

“How could we? We had no right.”, I’d want to cry and shout.

I’ve thought of all the joys we’ve forever missed

knowing you, hugging you and never being kissed.

What color was your hair? Did you have blue eyes?

Would you have been a happy child? Did the Dr. tell me lies?

I wish so very much we’d had a chance to meet,

To hold you, to love you and to see your tiny feet.

To hear your laughter, to know your sweet smile,

to always have you with us, our daughter, my child.

A mother’s suppose to nurture and protect their unborn

Not abolish or destroy, like an soul that’s been shorn.

I’ve prayed for God’s forgiveness, but could not forgive me;

the shame, the guilt and sadness, never would it leave.

I acknowledge forgiveness was always within my reach.

Jesus suffered for my sins when God sent his son to teach;

lessons about living, obeying, understanding right from wrong,

to grow in peace and love, along with keeping our faith strong.

I’ve learn whatever the Lord sends us, he gives us strength to cope,

Let not despair guide us, to believe in God’s message there’s hope.

You are my special angel, in heaven, awaiting patiently,

and I’m so eager to see you, when my soul has been set free.

Karen Hebert

8/18/09